dear deidre
I love best pal’s dad who wants me in threesome with other bloke
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DEAR DEIDRE: I’M having a full-on affair with my best friend’s dad.
The sex is amazing and I’m ready to tell the whole world we’re in love. But he says this isn’t the time.
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I’m 18 and he’s 40 and gorgeous. He looks nearer my age than his. We’ve been flirting for ages and I’ve known he’s liked me since I was 15. I let him know I felt the same about him.
I shared my 18th birthday party with his daughter, my friend. He bought me a drink and gave me a quick birthday kiss. He whispered, “So now you’re an adult, anything goes.”
I wasn’t quite sure what he meant but I stayed over at my friend’s house a few weeks later after seeing a band.
It was due to end late so he said he would meet us outside the hall and drive us both back to their place.
My friend went to bed but I was still buzzing from seeing my favourite band. My friend’s mum wasn’t there, as I think she was spending the night at her mum’s. There was just me and this hunk.
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He poured me a drink and then two or three more. He held me and kissed me and we had sex, really cosy and quietly so my friend didn’t know. It was my first time and it was great.
We’ve been meeting for sex ever since, when there’s no one around, either at their place or mine. He won’t use protection but says he’s an expert and says it’s quite safe.
I did have a pregnancy scare but it turned out OK.
He says he loves me and that he’ll get a divorce in a while. Meanwhile, he wants sexy pictures of me on his phone and is keen on a threesome with me and with some other bloke.
Does that sound a bit risky?
I was hoping our love would be out in the open by now so I don’t have to lie to my friend. I know she’ll be shocked but I hope she’ll come round. He wants me to give more but he wants it kept secret for now. He’s making me feel a bit insecure.
topic4today
SORRY to sound like a killjoy but one in three adults drinks enough alcohol to risk health problems such as liver disease.
They are also more prone to accidents and violence.
Self-help tactics and sources of support are explained in my e-leaflet Drink Problem?
Email me at problems@deardeidre.org or private message me on my DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
DEIDRE SAYS: I bet he says it’s not time to tell the world! Thank goodness alarm bells are starting to ring. This all sounds risky and wrong.
This man is a creep. He’s had his eye on you for years and is having the time of his life.
He’s never going to go public with this and he’s not going to end his marriage for you.
I’m sorry, you’re being used and you’re going to get hurt. If he cared about you he wouldn’t be risking an unplanned pregnancy or thinking of sharing you with another man.
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In fact, he would leave you alone to get on with your studies and meet someone nearer your age. This man’s in love with himself, not you.
Don’t send the photos and don’t have a threesome. Have an STI check and don’t see him again on your own. You deserve much better than this.
You need support but don’t go to your friend as I doubt she could ever forgive you. Get in touch with The Mix, it’s a safe place to talk it all through (themix.org.uk, 0808 808 4994).
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